I know you’ve heard that Pussycat Dolls song. If not let me refresh your memory. The chorus goes a little something like this:

When I grow up
I wanna rich
I wanna be famous
I wanna be a star
I wanna be in movies…

It ends with “Be careful what you wish ‘cuz you just might get it.” I think someone once said something to the affect of the reason people don’t do things isn’t because they’re afraid to fail, it’s because they’re afraid to succeed. Isn’t that the truth!

When I was younger I’m sure I wanted to be a million different things. I remember at one time I wanted to be a lawyer. Don’t ask me why, I don’t remember if I even had a reason but I remember that particular career option because it was the first real one. Before a lawyer I wanted to be a princess. Or an anime character.

Of course I’ve have always and probably will always want to be a singer. There’s nothing more I love than singing and I’ve been doing it for a long, long time. I sang in my elementary school choir, my middle school choir, my high school choir and the audition choir in high school. I sang in a professional children chorus that toured Europe. I minored in voice performance for two years in college and was apart of one of the college choirs for 3 years. I’ve been singing in my church choir since I was 10 and sing solos all the time. I’ve sung in two weddings and at a formal birthday party. I am a singer true and true. The only thing stopping me from pursuing what would be thought of as a no-brain-er career was that even though I sing in front of people all the time I still get really nervous. I’m sure I would eventually get over that sooner or later but also I was afraid of what it might mean if I actually succeeded. It would be hard to be the mother I’ve always wanted to be. Hard to be a great wife. I’d be on tour most of the year. I’d miss a lot of everyone’s life. They’d miss a lot of mine.

So then I thought I could be an actress! Starting out in small roles and working my way up! Hey, I wouldn’t care to be a top actress just as long as I could do something I like/love doing and get paid for it. I’ve done a little acting, nothing major of course, but I never put myself out there because yet again, I have minor stage fright. But being in movies is different! I wouldn’t be on a “stage” in front of hundreds of people. And if I messed up, I could start over again! Plus you can’t beat all the perks that come with being a movie star. I don’t care much for having a fan base or the popularity. I would get to hang out with Johnny Depp! Or at least meet him. Maybe be in the same movie as Nicole Kidman! What about all those parties I’d get to attend? The money wouldn’t be bad either! Instead of buying one Dooney every 6 months I could buy one a month! Walking the Red Carpet in gorgeous gowns! There are many many perks to being an actress in Hollywood. I would never get bored with it because in every movie I’d be a different character. We all know how I like to change things up a bit.

But as we all know, I am not pursuing a singing career or moving out to Hollywood to try my hand at acting. I’m in nursing school. Not as glamorous, I know, but it makes me happy and I’ll never be a millionaire and that’s OK. Money isn’t everything. I’ll be helping people, no, saving peoples’ lives.

Now, I’m not saying that if I get my big break I won’t take it. I most likely will but I’ve come to terms with my decision. It might have taken me a while to come to this conclusion but I’m so glad I did. What matters to me is the family I have and the family I want to have. That’s what makes me happy.

What did you want to be growing up? Are you happy with the career you’ve chosen?

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Today was my second day working at a local drug store and, although I’m still in training, I was on the cash register today several times by myself. I was ready for it though! It sure beats cleaning the bathroom, am I right?

So this woman comes up to the counter holding a can of drink mix/powder she had brought in herself. She starts telling me about this great product and how she usually gets it at another store but wants us to start stocking it here so she doesn’t have to drive the extra 20 miles for it. She sees that we care it in chocolate but she wants vanilla. I tell her I’ll right it down and let our manager know. Woman goes on to tell me that she likes chocolate just fine but since she drinks it every morning she wants a flavor that she LOVES. I tell her I understand. And then she tells me WHY she drinks it every morning: something about appetite suppressant and vitamins. I tell her it sounds like a great product. Woman says she’s 61 years old and doesn’t take any medication and she attributes it to this miracle drink powder. To be polite, I tell her maybe I should try it. Then the following conversation took place:

Woman: Please tell me YOU don’t already take medication?

me: Yes, I do. Only one though.

Woman: Oh? What for?

me: Depression and anxiety. (I’m not modest at these sort of things)

Woman: No! Well, are you Christian?

me: Yes Ma’am.

Woman: Are you sure? Have to been saved?

me: I have. (Methodists don’t really believe in “being saved” but I have been baptized, etc. but I didn’t care to get into that with her)

Woman: Honey, you need to repent and tell Jesus your problems. You need to have a closer relationship with God and his son. If you are a True Christian you will be healed.

me: (at this point I’m just smiling and letting her talk)

Woman: Physical illnesses are apart of aging and your body shutting down. Mental illnesses are the Devil trying to control your mind. Don’t you let him! How often do you read the bible?

me: …

Woman: You need to read it every day of every week of every month, and of every year. Just one day away from The Word will give the Devil just enough wiggle room. Don’t you let him!

Thankfully the phone began to ring so I told her to have a nice day and I answered the call.

This occurrence didn’t and doesn’t bother me really. I know, and God knows, what’s in my heart. I just thought it was funny/interesting and wanted to share.